7 replies to this topic

[rickoshay818]

ok so i was going to go to lazer tag when my friend told me a joke it goes like this:there was 3kids and a magic slide and heres what the magic slide did:if you wnet down it and said your favorite color u would land in it.So the first one went down and he said coke. The next went down and he said sprite.Then the next one went down and said wwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeee!And you know what happens next...

[DarkAngel]

ok so i was going to go to lazer tag when my friend told me a joke it goes like this:there was 3kids and a magic slide and heres what the magic slide did:if you wnet down it and said your favorite color u would land in it.So the first one went down and he said coke. The next went down and he said sprite.Then the next one went down and said wwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeee!And you know what happens next...

Hum..I seem to remember a dirtier version of that....

Went something like this:

3 Kids we on top of a hill. A genie told them he would turn them into whatever they asked for as they slid down the kill.

The first kid slides down and goes "I wanna be a Tiger!" Poof he was a tiger.

The Second kid slides down and goes "I wanna be a Lion!" Poof he was a lion.

The third kid goes to slide down the hill, but trips and tumbles down yelling "Oh SHIT!" And yes at the bottom of the hill he was turned into a pile of shit.

Eh, that's the version I know....problem with jokes on forums is you lose the whole delivery and facial contortions.

Maybe if I find some clean jokes Ill post one.

-DA

[Moose]

yea ive heard lots of versions of thos jokes
heres a lil crappy one that just makes u go....hahaha that was shit.

Ok there was a Brunette, red head and a blond.
they all got killed (sum how)
but to get to heaven they had to complete a course set by god.
there were 101 steps and a gate to heaven at the end.
but on each step there was a joke.
god said if they laugh they cant make it to heaven
ok so the brunette made it 3 steps without laughing.
the red head made it 22 steps without laughing.
and the blond made it to the 101th step and then started laughing.
God said "why did u laugh?"
The Blonde said " i just got the first three jokes...."

not very funny but makes u atleast say..."hah.....no"

[rickoshay818]

During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce."

Watson says: "I see millions of stars, and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life."

Holmes replies: "Watson, you idiot. Somebody stole our tent." the site says thats funny! I dont agree... anyways heres another:"A guy walked into a psychiatrist's office wearing only cling-film underpants. The psychiatrist said, 'Well, I can clearly see you're nuts'." And one more:A couple of hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing. His eyes are rolled back in his head.

The other guy whips out his mobile phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator, in a calm soothing voice, says: "Just take it easy. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There's silence, then a shot is heard.

The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says, "Okay, now what?"

That ones my fav.But yet i still have another:There was a blonde in a swimming race. The blonde swims 50 meters out of 100 meters and says,"I'm tired." So she swims back. Ive got more but ill post some more later.

[DarkAngel]

Funny!

FUNNY Commercials lol

-DA

[Faselei]

Just got sent this and as paddys day tomorrow...

A teacher asks her class to use the word 'contagious'.

Roland, the class geek, gets up and says, "Last year I got the measlesand my Mum said it was contagious."

"Well done, Roland" says the teacher. "Can anyone else try?"

Katie, a sweet little girl with pigtails, says, "My grandma says there's bug going round, and it's contagious."

"Well done, Katie" says the teacher, "Anyone else?"

Little Irish Shaun O'Malley jumps up and says "Our next door neighbor is painting his house with a two-inch brush and my Dad says "it will take the contagious".

.............?

*watches tumble weeds roll past*

[Faselei]

Okay okay i heard these in the pub recently:

"How many surrealsists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two: one to set the Girraffe on fire whislt the other fills the bath tub with purple jelly."

and a French joke:

"how do you consufe a Belgian?

show him a set of spades and ask him to take his pick!"

[Nalyid]

Hmm I heard a good one from Dave chepelle in his block party movie thing, but it may piss off some people, so all I can say is watch Block party!...I love racist jokes